We’ve all heard that there are only two things we can count on for certain: death and taxes. But anyone who has ever lost a job, suffered from an illness, or become estranged from a love one can tell you, there’s a third certainty that can be added to that list—setbacks. Setbacks happen, and they happen to everyone. Keep reading to learn five secrets for coping with setbacks.
Here is the positive spin. Setbacks are how we develop personal character and emotional resilience. It is not when the waters of life are calm and sailing is smooth that we grow, but when life is turbulent. These moments require heavy lifting, mentally and emotionally, which comes from facing our difficulties rather than blaming, ignoring, or distracting ourselves through various false and momentary pleasures. By facing setbacks, we not only learn to solve problems but also develop the inner strength to step up to whatever life throws our way.
Of course, not all setbacks are equal. Some are temporary, relatively minor and handled quickly—the flat tire on the way to work, the rain that cancels your golf game, your boss’s indecision, etc. Other setbacks are major—losing a job, illness, or estrangement of a loved one—and knock us off balance, diminish our happiness and well-being, and often weaken our confidence in ourselves.
The question is how we recover. Although not easy, we can recover from setbacks, not only as a function of the passage of time but by learning to manage our emotions and then moving forward by making positive choices. Here are five steps to help you do so.
It takes honesty, courage, responsibility, and persistence to step up to our setbacks. It requires a willingness to let go of the payoffs we get out of blame and wallowing. But it’s worth it as we realize that what’s inside us is bigger than what’s outside. You may be surprised at just how tough you really are.
What kinds of setbacks have you faced in your life? In what ways have you responded that have helped you conquer them or made you a better person?
My purpose is to teach you strategies to replace negative patterns with a positive state of mind from which you can achieve your greatest desires and live a joyful and abundant life.
Sign up to receive Dr. Roger Allen's newsletter, and receive a free copy of his eBook, Master Your Self-Defeating Emotions!
"Thank you for so much, it’s hard to put into words the feelings and emotions. You’re given me life, direction when I felt I had none. I’m slowly becoming a new person. Co-dependency is on its way out and self reliance and independence are on their way in."
Merry
Thank you for sharing. It really helps
You are welcome.