This is the week of Thanksgiving throughout the Americas, a holiday built around gratitude. We gather with family and friends, share a meal, and—often in a circle before dinner—take turns saying what we’re grateful for. It’s a pleasant ritual, but it can also be quick and sometimes superficial. Many of us mention blessings like health, home, or opportunities, but rarely do we express our gratitude for the people sitting right beside us in a way that truly touches their hearts.

This year, I invite you to consider an alternative—a quieter, more personal, deeply meaningful way of expressing gratitude. It’s a practice that doesn’t require a formal moment around the table, nor does it put anyone on the spot. It simply asks you to make a conscious effort to notice the people you love and recognize them for their actions, their goodness, and their presence in your life, perhaps creating a new Thanksgiving tradition.

The Power of Personal Affirmations

I call it the affirming skill and have written about it recently. Affirming is more than offering compliments. It is the intentional act of letting another person know that you see them—that you appreciate who they are, what they contribute, and how they enrich your life. A sincere word of appreciation can uplift someone’s spirit, strengthen your relationship, and create a memory that lingers far longer than turkey or pumpkin pie in your Thanksgiving tradition.

Imagine how it would feel if each person in your family experienced a moment—however brief—of being truly seen on Thanksgiving Day. Not as part of a group gratitude circle, but through a private, heartfelt exchange.

A Quieter Thanksgiving Tradition

Here’s the practice, something you can do whether or not you are celebrating a formal holiday:
Sometime during the day (or week), seek out each person in your family and express one simple, sincere affirmation. Not a long speech. Not a public announcement. Just a quiet, personal moment.

It might sound like this:

• “I really appreciate how you bring harmony to the family. You have a way of making everyone feel welcome.”
• “I admire how hard you’ve worked this year. You’ve persisted through some really big school challenges.”
• “Thank you for your kindness. You always look out for others, and it has made their lives easier.”
• “I’m grateful for your sense of humor. You lighten the room.”
• “I love how thoughtful you are—you notice the small things.”

Why This Matters

Most of us go through life wondering whether we are appreciated. Even in close families, we seldom pause long enough to say the good things we genuinely feel. Sometimes we assume our loved ones already know. Sometimes we’re too busy. Sometimes we’re simply out of practice.

Thanksgiving gives us a perfect opportunity to change that and perhaps start a meaningful  tradition.

A personal affirmation:

• strengthens bonds
• increases emotional closeness
• boosts confidence
• reduces conflict
• creates a sense of belonging
• and often becomes a moment people remember for years

These aren’t just nice outcomes—they are essential ingredients of a thriving family culture.

How to Practice Affirming Well

If this is new for you, here are a few guidelines:

1. Be Specific. Instead of “you’re great,” tell them what you appreciate. The more concrete, the more meaningful.
2. Be Sincere. Don’t overdo it. One authentic line is more powerful than ten flowery ones.
3. Be Observant. Affirm something about their character, behavior, or contribution.
4. Be Personal. Use their name. Make eye contact. Give the moment your full attention.
5. Keep It Quiet. This is not a performance or a group exercise. Its power is in its privacy.

Creating a Thanksgiving Your Family Will Remember

In a world filled with noise, comparison, and distraction, personal affirmation is a rare and precious gift. It costs nothing—but it can lift a spirit, heal a relationship, or remind someone of their value.

This Thanksgiving, instead of simply saying what you’re grateful for, tell someone why you are grateful for them. Your words may be the warmest thing they receive all day.

And who knows?
You may find that this quiet tradition becomes the most meaningful part of your holiday—one your family looks forward to year after year as a cherished Thanksgiving tradition.