Personal Growth

Empowering people to make strengthening choices

Grief vs. Drama

Grief vs. Drama

We all experience negative emotion. It is a natural part of life. Not only would our lives be boring without the ups and downs of our emotions, but negative emotions are how we learn and grow and become better, stronger human beings. Think about this. Without experiences that trigger such feelings as fear, hurt, loneliness, […]

By Roger K. Allen, Ph.D.


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Let Yourself Feel Sad: A Path to Healing from Depression

Let Yourself Feel Sad: A Path to Healing from Depression

Most of us try to avoid sadness. When we feel low or down, we distract ourselves or push those feelings away. But neuroscience shows that allowing yourself to feel sadness—rather than avoiding it—can actually support your recovery from depression and negative moods. This process is crucial when healing from depression. The Science Behind Feeling Your […]

By Roger K. Allen, Ph.D.


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The Skill of Affirming Others

The Skill of Affirming Others

In my last post, I talked about using affirming statements as a way of uplifting others, boosting motivation, and reinforcing desired behaviors. My experience is that well-chosen words can have an immediate and lasting impact. I now want to go one step further by sharing the skill of affirming others, specific steps that will make […]

By Roger K. Allen, Ph.D.


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Overcoming Resentment

Overcoming Resentment

In my last post, I talked about building goodwill by radiating a friendly, kind, benevolent, or cooperative attitude towards others. These are traits that most of us consider desirable. If given a conscious choice, most of us would choose to live from the affable emotional state of goodwill. And yet how often is our goodwill […]

By Roger K. Allen, Ph.D.


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Building Goodwill: A Crucial Relationship Skill

Building Goodwill: A Crucial Relationship Skill

I think of goodwill as an attitude which is friendly, kind, benevolent, helpful, or cooperative. Someone expressing goodwill radiates not only friendliness but openness and trust towards others as opposed to hostility and annoyance. Take just a moment to consider someone you know who comes from goodwill. Those in their presence feel seen and valued, […]

By Roger K. Allen, Ph.D.


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Take Control of Your Life Situation

Take Control of Your Life Situation

I’ve talked before about the distinction between your life and life situation. To give you a quick metaphor, your life situation is the pond you swim in – your relationships, your environment, your job, your health, etc.  But your life is how you choose to swim through it.  Even if there are storms or predators […]

By Roger K. Allen, Ph.D.


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What’s Your Relationship Dance?

What’s Your Relationship Dance?

In my last post, I talked about four styles of communication. Would you call yourself a dominator, accommodator, avoider, or collaborator in your communication? A Relationship Dance Of course, communication is two-way, meaning there are patterns that depend not only on your tendencies but that of others with whom you’re communicating. A dance is a good […]

By Roger K. Allen, Ph.D.


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4 Communication Styles: How to Grow Myself and My Relationships

4 Communication Styles: How to Grow Myself and My Relationships

I believe that communication is one of the key factors determining our success and how well how we navigate the world around us. Our ability to relate to other people, get things done, and develop close and healthy relationships can all be thought of as a function of our communication. Therefore, by improving how we […]

By Roger K. Allen, Ph.D.


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