One way of nourishing yourself is through stillness. This is quieting the mind and body by placing your full attention on the present moment.
As you’ve heard me say before, our world is filled with noise and distractions which alienate us from our inner, higher selves. We are continually connected to our cell-phones, tablets, computer screens, television or radio. Of course, we are blessed to live in a high-tech world. I wouldn’t want it any other way. But we are so attached to technology and bombarded by so much noise competing for our time and attention that we fail to listen to ourselves, our own thoughts, feelings, and intuition.
We have grown uncomfortable with silence. If things get quiet, we look at our phones. Or if we’re driving down the street, we turn on the radio. We arrive home and turn on the television or keep ourselves continually busy.
A few years ago, I bought a simple bell which I love using with our grandkids. At the end of the day, as we gather in the evenings, I’ll invite our grandkids (and usually their parents) to sit in a circle on a chair or the floor. I ask them to sit tall with their back erect and head up. I then let them know that I’m going to strike the bell and I want them to listen to its sound and raise a hand when they no longer hear it.
The bell sounds for about 60 seconds. When all hands are up, I ask the kids to talk about what it was like, sitting quietly and listening to the sound of the bell.
They like it. The practice brings peace into the room and calm to their hearts. We talk about the noise and chaos of our daily world and the sense of quiet when listening to the bell. Inevitably, they want to do it again. (Of course, the younger ones want to strike it themselves and I’ll sometimes give them that chance, a little later in the evening.)
But I’ll strike the bell again and this time I ask them to listen inside, to what it feels like to sit quietly. Again, they like the feeling. There is something wholesome about finding a moment of stillness in a busy, noisy world.
After doing this for two or three nights in a row, I’ve sometimes not brought the bell to our bedtime gathering, thinking that the kids would grow tired of it. But inevitably, someone asks about the bell. So, I’ll get it and we’ll practice stillness once again.
There are many practices to bring the power of stillness into your life. These don’t have to be big practices that take a lot of time and discipline. In fact, it’s good to find stillness regularly and in little ways. Let me mention just a few.
Science has proven that such practices bring many emotional and physical benefits such as lower blood pressure and heart rate, stronger immune system, greater calm and contentedness, more resilience and mental focus.
One of the biggest benefits of stillness is richer connections. In fact, most causes of depression can be considered losing our connections—with other human beings, with nature, with higher values, a sense of purpose, and meaningful work. And at the top of this list, I put losing our connection with ourselves. Practicing the power of stillness enables us to reconnect with our inner, spiritual natures.
However, I’ve found that lots of folks are afraid of being still, at least for long. The quiet puts them in touch with unwanted feelings—boredom, restlessness, loneliness, sadness, disappointment, frustration, shame, and so on.
I get that. But in truth avoiding those feelings doesn’t make them go away. They go underground and come out in subtle and harmful ways.
Better to feel them, to make space for your uncomfortable feelings. This is a big part of becoming, of nourishing and enlarging your heart or spirit. It is important that you become comfortable with your uncomfortable feelings. Because if you can stay with uncomfortable feelings, you’re reconnecting with something deeper inside yourself, perhaps a message that you need to hear to continue your journey of becoming. I’ve written about this in the past and will do so again in the future.
I do believe that most of us long for greater peace. Finding moments of stillness is a way to find or create that peace. And, as you can tell from my examples, these don’t have to be big moments of stillness. I’ve given you a few ideas. The question is what can you do to bring quiet and stillness to your daily and weekly routine?
My purpose is to teach you strategies to replace negative patterns with a positive state of mind from which you can achieve your greatest desires and live a joyful and abundant life.
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Linda Boice
Excellent article. Very practical suggestions on how to implement stillness into life.
Thanks, Gerard. I’m glad you like it. I think we’d all be better off practicing more stillness.
Thank you Roger for this valuable and beautiful article!
I’ve actually caught many moments of stillness, which made me reflect on the human as a whole. It has made me ease my noise, listening to others which confirms we are not alone. Patience with self & others. I finally finished “The Hero’s Choice”. I have taken a few things I have read from you Dr. Allen; for instance, taking time from phone daily & difference between staying positive & being happy (in the moment) – how being in the moment can help. Thank you
Thanks for your comments about stillness. It sounds like it has made a big difference in your life and relationships. And I’m glad you’ve read “The Hero’s Choice.” Thanks for sharing your insights. My best to you in your ongoing journey.
Hi Judy. You are welcome. I’m glad you enjoyed the article.