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personal responsibility

Empowering people to make strengthening choices

Letting Go of Shame by Reframing My Story

Letting Go of Shame by Reframing My Story

I recall a personal experience from when I was a boy. I was about 14 years of age. A group of us were playing basketball in the backyard of our neighbors. Jeff, the neighbor boy, got really mad about something and ran into his house. The game broke up and I walked over to our […]

By rogerkallen


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The Relationship in Your Head

The Relationship in Your Head

In a recent blog post, I talked about the differences between owning versus disowning responsibility for yourself in your relationship with your partner. I shared a story in which I made myself a victim of Judy until I stopped to think about it and was able to alter my reaction. I went from feeling like […]

By rogerkallen


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Take Personal Responsibility to Build a Happy Marriage

Take Personal Responsibility to Build a Happy Marriage

The phrase personal responsibility has a lot of meanings so let me be clear about what I’m talking about. It means that you take ownership of your life. You’re not a passenger but in the driver’s seat of your life. Life does not simply happen to you. Rather, you shape your life by your ability […]

By rogerkallen


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Playing the Victim in My Marriage

Playing the Victim in My Marriage

In my last blog post, I talked about how we are responsible for our own happiness in marriage. This is not something we can sluff off on our spouses. That doesn’t mean I always walk my talk. In this article, I want to share a story about playing the victim in my marriage. Hopefully, it […]

By rogerkallen


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You Better Take Good Care of Yourself to Have a Happy Marriage

You Better Take Good Care of Yourself to Have a Happy Marriage

A belief of mine is that you have to take good care of yourself to have a healthy and happy relationship. Taking good care of yourself is your job and not something you can sluff onto your partner. Of course, the beginning of a relationship feels so different. I was just scanning face book yesterday […]

By rogerkallen


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Handling Fear

Handling Fear

I remember walking home from school one afternoon aware of a looming confrontation between the United States and Soviet Union over the placement of nuclear missiles on the Island of Cuba. President John Kennedy and inner circle had pondered America’s response to the Soviet’s intent and decided to meet the challenge with a military blockade […]

By rogerkallen


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The Empowerment Model

The Empowerment Model

In this article, I want to talk about “The Empowerment Model.” For years, I’ve talked about it in the context of “key moments,” those situations and events in which our emotions are engaged and it’s easy to react or act out our negative feelings. But I like thinking of it as an empowerment model because by […]

By rogerkallen


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Self-Responsibility (Owning What’s Inside Rather than Trying to Change What’s Outside)

Self-Responsibility (Owning What’s Inside Rather than Trying to Change What’s Outside)

Self-responsibility is the key to a happy and successful life. Consider that there are two types of problems– “out there” and “in here.” By “out there” I’m talking about events and circumstances. Your neighbor’s dog does its business in front of your house every morning. Your mother-in-law criticizes how you’re raising your kids. A co-worker […]

By rogerkallen


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